Canker Sores

290 Marbles
Have you ever been hurt and the place tries to heal a bit, and you just pull the scar off of it over and over again.
Rosa Parks 

   I have a canker sore in my mouth.  My tongue always goes to it, probing it, hurting it.  I’m not sure why my tongue won’t leave it alone, find another resting spot in my mouth that isn’t quite so sore.
   I have an Ex-man in my head.  My mind festers with arguments with him, defending my point of view and the way I see the world.  Just like with a canker sore, I function through my life without anyone really knowing it’s there.  Sure, some people know that there’s been a breakup but they don’t see all the little strings of connections that just won’t be cut, they don’t see all the underground angst (the exception is you, dear Reader, who has access to all my neuroses). 
   A good friend reminded me that I have a choice what to decorate my mind with.  When my mind goes to the negative, she suggested I wear an elastic and I snap it to get my mind back on track.  My wrist is now sore.  I probe at the breakup.  It hurts.  I don’t know why I just can't leave it alone, find some other area of focus in my expansive mind. 
   I’m not sure why my mind keeps going there.  It’s like the tongue on the canker sore.  It only causes more pain and it doesn’t help in the healing.  What would it take for me to let go?  Another person? Ha, I’ve decided against that remedy.  I ask again, what would it take for me to let go?  The answer comes back: Time.  Marble upon marble of time.

I try to remind my children that the body moves toward healing.  When they cut themselves it takes time but eventually, their bodies heal the cut.  Know today that if you’re still feeling pain from the severed feel that a breakup can have, the spirit moves toward healing and in time, the cut will feel healed.