Songchronicity

360 Marbles 
The primary cause of unhappiness is never the situation but your thoughts about it.
Eckhart Tolle, "A New Earth: Awakening to Your Life's Purpose"

    Why is it that after a split there seems to be more breakup songs on the radio?  I call this phenomenon “songchronicity” or the seeming connection of my life with causally unrelated random songs (otherwise known as the Cosmic DJ Phenomenon). 
   If I were to leave it to the radio, I’d be at the mercy of hearing breakup songs at the most inappropriate times, like when I’m driving into work.  It’s not that a good cry isn’t valuable in the process of letting go, but not in the car, and not when I have to have my game-face ready for work. 
    Then there are those not-so-random songs associated with my past relationship: songs that Ex-man and I have danced to and loved to.   It makes me sad when I listen to these songs, especially “Power of Two” by the Indigo Girls.  To make matters worse for me, Ex-man is a gifted piano player and songwriter who wrote several songs for me over our years together including the one he wrote for my eighteenth birthday.  Many of these songs I have on cassette tapes (yep, even the storage device is old).  It’s time for me to let go of the musical score of our relationship.
    But what to replace it with?  Today I make a love-song playlist for myself - an arsenal of uplifting and inspirational songs that I’ve downloaded to my iPod.  These include:

1.  Pink Martini’s “Hang on Little Tomato.” As China Forbes croons, I become confident that I can “hang on to the vine.”
2.  Stephanie Bentley’s “I Will Survive” (not to be confused with Gloria Gaynor’s song with the same title). 
3.  “Hallelujah”  sung by Rufus Wainwright - don’t really know why this one is in there, it just is.    
4.  Indie Arie’s version of “The Heart of the Matter” – a great moving on song.
5.  Bob Marley’s “Three Little Birds” – Don’t worry about  a thing . . .
6.  O-O-H Child – Nina Simone – “Things are gonna get easier , . . Things are gonna get brighter.” 
7.  “Love is all Around” the old Mary Tyler Moore theme song – the ultimate pep talk – I prefer the edgier Joan Jett version.
8.  One Hand in my Pocket - Alanis Morissette - This song sums up the complex and often contradictory emotions that I’m feeling post breakup.  “But what it all comes down to, is everything’s going to be fine, fine, fine.”
9.  Galileo - Indigo Girls - “I call on the resting soul, of Galileo, king of night vision, king of insight.”   
10. Cigarra - Simone - a Brazilian song that I loved as a young girl.  
11. Little Boxes - The Angelique Kidjo version - it reminds me to think outside the box. 
12. Love is Everything - k.d. lang - because it was always about love. 

    When I compile these songs in my “Morning” playlist, they are like a soothing balm applied to my spirit.  The great thing about music is that it unites us by shared experiences -there isn’t anything that I am experiencing with this breakup that hasn’t been felt by a fellow human. This makes me feel less alone. 
    And sometimes life reminds me to laugh when my niece sends me a link to the OK Go song, "Needing/Getting." http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MejbOFk7H6c&feature=player_embedded# :) Who are these wise crazies and will they come over for dinner? 

Make yourself a playlist of inspirational tunes to start your morning off or send you to bed in the right mood.  Use the mix as your personal medicine pouch of songs that will lift you up when your down and remind you that you’re not alone.