137 Marbles
God can dream a bigger dream for me, for you, than you could ever dream for yourself. When you've worked as hard and done as much and strived and tried and given and pled and bargained and hoped...surrender. When you have done all that you can do, and there's nothing left for you to do, give it up. Give it up to that thing that is greater than yourself, and let it then become a part of the flow.
Oprah
Surrender - how can three little syllables pack such a big punch? For me, it evokes images of submission or yielding to another, and giving up control (not something that I’m super comfortable with). With images of the Wicked Witch of the West skywriting “Surrender Dorothy” with her broomstick, surrender doesn’t feel like an awesome thing to do.
The Merriam-Webster dictionary defines surrender as, “giving up completely or agreeing to forgo especially in favor of another.” It can also be defined as ceasing resistance to an enemy or opponent and submitting to their authority. There seems to be an adversarial relationship inherent between the surrenderer and the surrenderee. Yet when you examine capitulate (one of surrender’s close friends), it is defined as giving up all resistance, which is somehow more acceptable to me.
Yet how can I be someone who actively creates my life and surrenders at the same time? Aren’t those two actions mutually exclusive?
Eckhart Tolle has an interesting way of looking at surrender. He writes, “If you were stuck in the mud somewhere, you wouldn‘t say, ‘Okay, I resign myself to being stuck in the mud.’ Resignation is not surrender. You don’t need to accept an undesirable or unpleasant life situation. Nor do you need to deceive yourself and say that there is nothing wrong with being stuck in the mud. No. You recognize fully that you want to get out of it. You then narrow your attention down to the present moment without mentally labeling it in any way. This means that there is no judgment of the Now. Therefore, there is no resistance, no emotional negativity. You accept the “isness” of this moment. Then you take action and do all you can to get out of the mud. Such action is called positive action. It is far more effective than negative action, which arises out of anger, despair, or frustration.
Surrender, one could say, is the inner transition from resistance to acceptance, from “no” to “yes.” When you surrender, your sense of self shifts from being identified with a reaction or mental judgment to being the space around the reaction or judgment. It is a shift from identification with form - the thought or the emotion - to being and recognizing yourself as that which has no form - spacious awareness.” In other words, accept the moment and do all you can do to change it if it is undesirable.
But what if all your efforts to effect change come to naught? Oprah would suggest it is time to let go and surrender. She explains, “letting go is not about giving up on a dream - it’s about knowing you’ve tried everything you can think of and deciding to accept whatever comes next.” For now I’ll surrender to my unwillingness to surrender.
How can you let go of control and be more comfortable with surrender? Is it possible that a better relationship with surrender would have made your breakup with X a little more tolerable? Is frequent resistance to what "is" the cause of your struggle? Could you be more comfortable with "white flag" moments?
God can dream a bigger dream for me, for you, than you could ever dream for yourself. When you've worked as hard and done as much and strived and tried and given and pled and bargained and hoped...surrender. When you have done all that you can do, and there's nothing left for you to do, give it up. Give it up to that thing that is greater than yourself, and let it then become a part of the flow.
Oprah
Surrender - how can three little syllables pack such a big punch? For me, it evokes images of submission or yielding to another, and giving up control (not something that I’m super comfortable with). With images of the Wicked Witch of the West skywriting “Surrender Dorothy” with her broomstick, surrender doesn’t feel like an awesome thing to do.
The Merriam-Webster dictionary defines surrender as, “giving up completely or agreeing to forgo especially in favor of another.” It can also be defined as ceasing resistance to an enemy or opponent and submitting to their authority. There seems to be an adversarial relationship inherent between the surrenderer and the surrenderee. Yet when you examine capitulate (one of surrender’s close friends), it is defined as giving up all resistance, which is somehow more acceptable to me.
Yet how can I be someone who actively creates my life and surrenders at the same time? Aren’t those two actions mutually exclusive?
Eckhart Tolle has an interesting way of looking at surrender. He writes, “If you were stuck in the mud somewhere, you wouldn‘t say, ‘Okay, I resign myself to being stuck in the mud.’ Resignation is not surrender. You don’t need to accept an undesirable or unpleasant life situation. Nor do you need to deceive yourself and say that there is nothing wrong with being stuck in the mud. No. You recognize fully that you want to get out of it. You then narrow your attention down to the present moment without mentally labeling it in any way. This means that there is no judgment of the Now. Therefore, there is no resistance, no emotional negativity. You accept the “isness” of this moment. Then you take action and do all you can to get out of the mud. Such action is called positive action. It is far more effective than negative action, which arises out of anger, despair, or frustration.
Surrender, one could say, is the inner transition from resistance to acceptance, from “no” to “yes.” When you surrender, your sense of self shifts from being identified with a reaction or mental judgment to being the space around the reaction or judgment. It is a shift from identification with form - the thought or the emotion - to being and recognizing yourself as that which has no form - spacious awareness.” In other words, accept the moment and do all you can do to change it if it is undesirable.
But what if all your efforts to effect change come to naught? Oprah would suggest it is time to let go and surrender. She explains, “letting go is not about giving up on a dream - it’s about knowing you’ve tried everything you can think of and deciding to accept whatever comes next.” For now I’ll surrender to my unwillingness to surrender.
How can you let go of control and be more comfortable with surrender? Is it possible that a better relationship with surrender would have made your breakup with X a little more tolerable? Is frequent resistance to what "is" the cause of your struggle? Could you be more comfortable with "white flag" moments?
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