127 Marbles
Live so that when your children think of fairness, caring, and integrity, they think of you.
H. Jackson Brown, Jr.
My eldest sister came for a visit yesterday and we chatted about the lessons that we had learned from growing up in our family. One of the things that I learned was to be aware that people might not act in my best interest, or the best interest of the family. We laughed at our inclinations to prepare for the worst case scenario. I told her, “There’s not much that surprises me,” then I added, “Actually it surprises me when people act with the highest level of integrity.”
But I love being surprised…I borrowed my Ex-husband’s computer this afternoon to do some writing work on a program that isn’t available for my Mac (unbelievable but true). We shared a meal and a glass of wine afterward and talked about our son and how proud we are of him. My Ex said, “I’m happy that things have always worked well between all of us. I hear horror stories of people’s court battles and I can’t imagine that kind of pain. I hope our son will be spared that in his life.”
My ex-husband was emotionally open and honest through our break up, he was non-judgmental, vulnerable, and strong. He never used anger as a shield for his vulnerability. I will always admire the space of integrity he held for us during that time. We made a promise that we would always share a glass of champagne to celebrate our son’s birthday. As time went on and our separate families grew, we didn’t always have the champagne but we did preserve was the spirit of the commitment to always be on good terms.
When the author of Life’s Little Instruction Book wrote the above quote about fairness, caring, and integrity, he didn’t write the caveat: unless of course, you’re divorcing the other parent. But breakups often bring out the worst in people. What would it take to stand in integrity especially during a breakup?
What would it take to follow Miguel Ruiz and “Be impeccable with your word. Speak with integrity. Say only what you mean. Avoid using the word to speak against yourself or to gossip about others. Use the power of your word in the direction of truth and love”? If you’re still going through the details of your breakup, what would it take to allow these words to set the tone?
Live so that when your children think of fairness, caring, and integrity, they think of you.
H. Jackson Brown, Jr.
My eldest sister came for a visit yesterday and we chatted about the lessons that we had learned from growing up in our family. One of the things that I learned was to be aware that people might not act in my best interest, or the best interest of the family. We laughed at our inclinations to prepare for the worst case scenario. I told her, “There’s not much that surprises me,” then I added, “Actually it surprises me when people act with the highest level of integrity.”
But I love being surprised…I borrowed my Ex-husband’s computer this afternoon to do some writing work on a program that isn’t available for my Mac (unbelievable but true). We shared a meal and a glass of wine afterward and talked about our son and how proud we are of him. My Ex said, “I’m happy that things have always worked well between all of us. I hear horror stories of people’s court battles and I can’t imagine that kind of pain. I hope our son will be spared that in his life.”
My ex-husband was emotionally open and honest through our break up, he was non-judgmental, vulnerable, and strong. He never used anger as a shield for his vulnerability. I will always admire the space of integrity he held for us during that time. We made a promise that we would always share a glass of champagne to celebrate our son’s birthday. As time went on and our separate families grew, we didn’t always have the champagne but we did preserve was the spirit of the commitment to always be on good terms.
When the author of Life’s Little Instruction Book wrote the above quote about fairness, caring, and integrity, he didn’t write the caveat: unless of course, you’re divorcing the other parent. But breakups often bring out the worst in people. What would it take to stand in integrity especially during a breakup?
What would it take to follow Miguel Ruiz and “Be impeccable with your word. Speak with integrity. Say only what you mean. Avoid using the word to speak against yourself or to gossip about others. Use the power of your word in the direction of truth and love”? If you’re still going through the details of your breakup, what would it take to allow these words to set the tone?
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