238 Marbles
It’s spring where I am at in the marble process and I’ve definitely got the spring cleaning bug. There’s so much stuff that left along with Ex-man when he moved out but I’m ready now to do some assessments of what I want let go of and what I want to keep.
I’ve been going through my house, cupboard by cupboard, drawer by drawer, getting rid of clutter and everything that I no longer use. Some things go into a donation pile and some things get thrown away; It’s incredibly liberating to get rid of the stuff that I’ve been holding onto - it frees up space and energy for more flow. Sometimes when I go to put them in the donation pile, I get a sense of a friend who would really enjoy a certain item so I put it aside for her. There have been some awesome pairings of items to new owners and that makes me happy.
I’m also noticing that I am able to have better "stuff management": I’ve found things that I didn’t know I had and I’ve been able to put them to use (who knew I had silver cleaner?); I’ve moved things around so they are closer to the areas where they get used (all those little lotion samples I put in the car where my hands always get dry); and I’ve seen gaps - things that I need to purchase (I need new tea towels).
The culling of the clothes closet has been interesting. I’ve gotten rid of a flowery dress that Ex-man sent me when he was living in another city ("sentimental" value). I’ve gotten rid of overcoats of my Dad’s that I couldn’t donate after he died (again, sentimental). Too many pairs of capris didn’t make the cut and I realized that I was holding onto that particular look because Ex-man had once commented that he thought it suited me. Really? Did I unconsciously do that? At the end of the process when I had empty hangars, I knew I wanted to buy more dresses. I like dresses and my old ones no longer suited me.
Then I turned my eyes on my kids drawers. My youngest son doesn’t really have attachments to clothes so it was just a matter of donating the ones that no longer fit. My daughter didn’t want to let anything go but when I opened her drawers, they were packed with clothes she didn’t wear, mainly hand-me downs and consignment finds. When I suggested that she let go of the clothes that she didn’t enjoy wearing she replied, “Then I wouldn’t have anything in my drawers.” That made me a bit sad. I said, “It’ll make room for getting what you do want. We’ll buy you some new clothes that you love.” She looked at me and said, “But we can’t afford it.” It’s odd - I don’t talk to my kids about not being able to afford things because I think it’s my job to figure out how I can get them what they need. She is so sensitive that she has absorbed that I don’t make a great deal of money. I looked her in the eye and told her that we could afford it and she started to tear up, “No, I don’t need anything, I don’t need anything.” I replied, “It’s okay to need things, Honey.” She looked at me tentatively at first but then started helping in the process of letting go of the things she didn’t love.
And that’s the essence of a breakup: letting go of what you no longer love or what no longer fits and making way for what you do love/will love.
Are there things you’ve held onto post breakup that you can let go of now? Is it time to cull your room/apartment/cottage/house and discard/donate belongings that no longer have a purpose in your life? The extra space can be quite liberating.
It’s spring where I am at in the marble process and I’ve definitely got the spring cleaning bug. There’s so much stuff that left along with Ex-man when he moved out but I’m ready now to do some assessments of what I want let go of and what I want to keep.
I’ve been going through my house, cupboard by cupboard, drawer by drawer, getting rid of clutter and everything that I no longer use. Some things go into a donation pile and some things get thrown away; It’s incredibly liberating to get rid of the stuff that I’ve been holding onto - it frees up space and energy for more flow. Sometimes when I go to put them in the donation pile, I get a sense of a friend who would really enjoy a certain item so I put it aside for her. There have been some awesome pairings of items to new owners and that makes me happy.
I’m also noticing that I am able to have better "stuff management": I’ve found things that I didn’t know I had and I’ve been able to put them to use (who knew I had silver cleaner?); I’ve moved things around so they are closer to the areas where they get used (all those little lotion samples I put in the car where my hands always get dry); and I’ve seen gaps - things that I need to purchase (I need new tea towels).
The culling of the clothes closet has been interesting. I’ve gotten rid of a flowery dress that Ex-man sent me when he was living in another city ("sentimental" value). I’ve gotten rid of overcoats of my Dad’s that I couldn’t donate after he died (again, sentimental). Too many pairs of capris didn’t make the cut and I realized that I was holding onto that particular look because Ex-man had once commented that he thought it suited me. Really? Did I unconsciously do that? At the end of the process when I had empty hangars, I knew I wanted to buy more dresses. I like dresses and my old ones no longer suited me.
Then I turned my eyes on my kids drawers. My youngest son doesn’t really have attachments to clothes so it was just a matter of donating the ones that no longer fit. My daughter didn’t want to let anything go but when I opened her drawers, they were packed with clothes she didn’t wear, mainly hand-me downs and consignment finds. When I suggested that she let go of the clothes that she didn’t enjoy wearing she replied, “Then I wouldn’t have anything in my drawers.” That made me a bit sad. I said, “It’ll make room for getting what you do want. We’ll buy you some new clothes that you love.” She looked at me and said, “But we can’t afford it.” It’s odd - I don’t talk to my kids about not being able to afford things because I think it’s my job to figure out how I can get them what they need. She is so sensitive that she has absorbed that I don’t make a great deal of money. I looked her in the eye and told her that we could afford it and she started to tear up, “No, I don’t need anything, I don’t need anything.” I replied, “It’s okay to need things, Honey.” She looked at me tentatively at first but then started helping in the process of letting go of the things she didn’t love.
And that’s the essence of a breakup: letting go of what you no longer love or what no longer fits and making way for what you do love/will love.
Are there things you’ve held onto post breakup that you can let go of now? Is it time to cull your room/apartment/cottage/house and discard/donate belongings that no longer have a purpose in your life? The extra space can be quite liberating.
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