The Devil You Know

174 Marbles 

If you don't like something change it; if you can't change it, change the way you think about it.  

Mary Engelbreit

    I took a call from my sister today just as I was heading out the door.  She’s eighteen years older than I am so we’re not super close but she was trying to catch up and connect.  She asked me, “What’s new?” When I told her that there wasn’t much that was new, she answered, “That’s good” - not a I’m-not-really-listening-to-your-answer response but a sincere, I’m-glad-there’s-nothing-new response. 
    This got me curious: Why was it good that nothing was new?  Sometimes new can be very good but I come from a family of “No news is good news” people.  Growing up in this environment has often made me avoid change.  I can be a “change wincer” - when I sense change coming down the pipeline, I tense up with dread of the unknown.  Change is like a spiked dodge-ball coming my way and I do my best to avoid it.  I know I’ve asked it before but what would it take for me to view change as a positive improvement? 
    I’ve been steeped in the sentiment “The devil you know is better than the devil you don’t know” but it’s a hefty assumption that the devil you don’t know is even a devil.  Oddly the sentiment behind this adage has kept many of my kin in unhappy relationships where their spouse/partner is viewed as “the devil you know.”  Is there such a thing as a match made in hell? 
    You might think,”How can she even talk about change in a general sense?”  Change is specific: some is good and some is not so good.  You’re right - I’m talking about change in a nebulous fashion because it helps reveal the perceived thematic plot of one’s life.  Do you view your life as an ever-improving “fairy tale” where there are difficulties but in the end it all works out happily-ever-after?  Do you view your life as a tragedy where things go south and keep getting worse?  Or do you view your life as a comedy where the only real goal is to remember to keep laughing? 
    My belief is that the plot of one’s life can be shifted.  We are, after all, the writers of our lives and I’d like to lose the tragic element in lieu of the ever-popular rom com, a tale of love and laughter.   

How have you been conditioned to view change?  Do you view it as positive and something that you welcome?  Do you view it as something to be avoided?  Do you view it as neutral? If you don't like the way you view change, can you change the way you think about it?